It's easy if you Thai

Which is a shame, as it's a beautiful place, and if you like hot food, then you really are in for a treat. Luckily for you, your humble writer isn't an amoral pervert, so you'll only be getting the most wholesome tourist content.

And what more wholesome thing is there to do than sport, and ocean sport in particular? Samui Ocean Sports in Koh Samui is a corking little company that organises kayaking, yachting, snorkelling and island sight seeing around the Gulf of Thailand, as well as teaching you to sail and letting you hire speedboats. They even do sunset cruises, and while the pound might be weak right now, it's hardly affecting its relationship to the Baht.

If you're unlucky while you're in Thailand you might be surrounded by braying public school nitwits bumping into each other and going 'ooooh, how random!', not realising that it's no surprise that the big faced poshos keep seeing each other in far flung places, given that they all 'go travelling' at exactly the same time every year after university. Honestly, some people.